1. Regular naps prevent old age... especially if you take them while driving.
2. Having one child makes you a parent; having two makes you a referee.
3. Marriage is a relationship in which one person is always right and the other is the husband!
4. They said we should all pay our tax with a smile. I tried- but they wanted cash.
5. A child's greatest period of growth is the month after you've purchased new school uniforms.
6. Don't feel bad. A lot of people have no talent.
7. Don't marry the person you want to live with, marry the one you cannot live without... but whatever you do, you'll regret it later.
8. You can't buy love. . But you pay heavily for it.
9. True friends stab you in the front.
10. Forgiveness is giving up my right to hate you for hurting me.
11. Bad officials are elected by good citizens who do not vote.
12. Laziness is nothing more than the habit of resting before you get tired.
13. My wife and I always compromise. I admit I'm wrong and she agrees with me.
14. Those who can't laugh at themselves leave the job to others.
15. Ladies first. Pretty ladies sooner.
16. It doesn't matter how often a married man changes his job, he still ends up with the same boss.
17. They call our language the mother tongue because the father seldom gets to speak.
18. Saving is the best thing. Especially when your parents have done it for you.
19. Wise men talk because they have something to say; fools talk because they have to say something.
20. Real friends are the ones who survive transitions between address books
Friday, June 11, 2010
Don't miss even a single word
Don't miss even a single word.... It's Too good
An atheist professor of philosophy speaks to his class on the problem science has with God, The Almighty.
He asks one of his new students to stand and.....
Prof:
So you believe in God?
Student:
Absolutely, sir.
Prof
: Is God good?
Student:
Sure.
Prof:
Is God all-powerful?
Student
: Yes..
Prof:
My brother died of cancer even though he prayed to God to heal him.
Most of us would attempt to help others who are ill. But God didn't. How is this God good then? Hmm? size=2>
(Student is silent.)
Prof:
You can't answer, can you? Let's start again, young fella. Is God good?
Student:
Yes.
Prof:
Is Satan good?
Student
: No.
Prof:
Where does Satan come from?
Student:
From....God...
Prof:
That's right. Tell me son, is there evil in this world?
Student:
Yes.
Prof:
Evil is everywhere, isn't it? And God did make everything. Correct?
Student:
Yes.
Prof:
So who created evil?
(Student does not answer.)
Prof:
Is there sickness? Immorality? Hatred? Ugliness? All these terrible things exist in the world, don't they?
Student:
Yes, sir.
Prof:
So, who created them?
(Student has no answer.)
Prof:
Science says you have 5 senses you use to identify and observe the world around you.
Tell me, son...Have you everseen God?
Student:
No, sir.
Prof:
Tell us if you have ever heard your God?
Student:
No, sir.
Prof:
Have you ever felt your God, tasted your God, smelt your God? Have you ever had any sensory perception of God for that matter?
Student:
No, sir. I'm afraid I haven't.
Prof:
Yet you still believe in Him?
Student:
Yes.
Prof:
According to empirical, testable, demonstrable protocol, science says your GOD doesn't exist.
What do you say to that, son?
Student:
Nothing. I only have my faith.
Prof:
Yes. Faith. And that is the problem science has.
Student:
Professor, is there such a thing as heat?
Prof:
Yes.
Student:
And is there such a thing as cold?
Prof:
Yes.
Student:
No sir. There isn't.
(The lecture theatre becomes very quiet with this turn of events.)
Student
: Sir, you can have lots of heat, even more heat, superheat, mega heat, white heat, a little heat or no heat..
But we don't have anything called cold. We can hit 458 degrees below zero which is no heat, but we can't
go any further after that.
There is no such thing as cold. Cold is only a word we use to describe the absence of heat
. We cannot measure cold. Heat is energy Cold is not the opposite of heat, sir, just the absence of it .
(There is pin-drop silence in the lecture theatre.)
Student:
What about darkness, Professor? Is there such a thing as darkness?
Prof:
Yes. What is night if there isn't darkness?
Student :
You're wrong again, sir. Darkness is the absence of something. You can have low light, normal light, bright
light, flashing light.....But if you have no light constantly, you have nothing and it's called darkness, isn't it? In
reality, darkness isn't. If it were you would be able to make darkness darker, wouldn't you?
Prof:
So what is the point you are making, young man?
Student:
Sir, my point is your philosophical premise is flawed.
Prof:
Flawed? Can you explain how?
Student:
Sir, you are working on the premise of duality. You argue there is life and then there is death, a good God and a bad God. You are viewing the concept of God as something finite, something we can measure. Sir, science can't even explain a thought.. It uses electricity and magnetism, but has never seen, much less fully understood either one.To view death as the opposite of life is to be ignorant of the fact that death cannot exist as a substantive thing. Death is
not the opposite of life: just the absence of it.
Now tell me, Professor.Do you teach your students that they evolved from a monkey?
Prof:
If you are referring to the natural evolutionary process, yes, of course, I do.
Student:
Have you ever observed evolution with your own eyes, sir?
(The Professor shakes his head with a smile, beginning to realize where the argument is going.)
Student:
Since no one has ever observed the process of evolution at work and cannot even prove that this process is an on-going endeavor, are you not teaching your opinion, sir? Are you not a scientist but a preacher? (The class is in uproar.)
Student:
Is there anyone in the class who has ever seen the Professor's brain?
(The class breaks out into laughter.)
Student
: Is there anyone here who has ever heard the Professor's brain, felt it, touched or smelt it? No one appears to have done so. So, according to the established rules of empirical, stable, demonstrable protocol, science says that you have no brain,sir.
With all due respect, sir, how do we then trust your lectures, sir?
(The room is silent. The professor stares at the student, his face unfathomable.)
Prof:
I guess you'll have to take them on faith, son.
Student:
That is it sir... The link between man & god is FAITH . That is all that keeps things moving & alive.
NB: I believe you have enjoyed the conversation...and if so...you'll probably want your friends/colleagues to enjoy the same...won't you?....
this is a true story, and the
student was none other than .......
..APJ Abdul Kalam, the former President of India.
An atheist professor of philosophy speaks to his class on the problem science has with God, The Almighty.
He asks one of his new students to stand and.....
Prof:
So you believe in God?
Student:
Absolutely, sir.
Prof
: Is God good?
Student:
Sure.
Prof:
Is God all-powerful?
Student
: Yes..
Prof:
My brother died of cancer even though he prayed to God to heal him.
Most of us would attempt to help others who are ill. But God didn't. How is this God good then? Hmm? size=2>
(Student is silent.)
Prof:
You can't answer, can you? Let's start again, young fella. Is God good?
Student:
Yes.
Prof:
Is Satan good?
Student
: No.
Prof:
Where does Satan come from?
Student:
From....God...
Prof:
That's right. Tell me son, is there evil in this world?
Student:
Yes.
Prof:
Evil is everywhere, isn't it? And God did make everything. Correct?
Student:
Yes.
Prof:
So who created evil?
(Student does not answer.)
Prof:
Is there sickness? Immorality? Hatred? Ugliness? All these terrible things exist in the world, don't they?
Student:
Yes, sir.
Prof:
So, who created them?
(Student has no answer.)
Prof:
Science says you have 5 senses you use to identify and observe the world around you.
Tell me, son...Have you everseen God?
Student:
No, sir.
Prof:
Tell us if you have ever heard your God?
Student:
No, sir.
Prof:
Have you ever felt your God, tasted your God, smelt your God? Have you ever had any sensory perception of God for that matter?
Student:
No, sir. I'm afraid I haven't.
Prof:
Yet you still believe in Him?
Student:
Yes.
Prof:
According to empirical, testable, demonstrable protocol, science says your GOD doesn't exist.
What do you say to that, son?
Student:
Nothing. I only have my faith.
Prof:
Yes. Faith. And that is the problem science has.
Student:
Professor, is there such a thing as heat?
Prof:
Yes.
Student:
And is there such a thing as cold?
Prof:
Yes.
Student:
No sir. There isn't.
(The lecture theatre becomes very quiet with this turn of events.)
Student
: Sir, you can have lots of heat, even more heat, superheat, mega heat, white heat, a little heat or no heat..
But we don't have anything called cold. We can hit 458 degrees below zero which is no heat, but we can't
go any further after that.
There is no such thing as cold. Cold is only a word we use to describe the absence of heat
. We cannot measure cold. Heat is energy Cold is not the opposite of heat, sir, just the absence of it .
(There is pin-drop silence in the lecture theatre.)
Student:
What about darkness, Professor? Is there such a thing as darkness?
Prof:
Yes. What is night if there isn't darkness?
Student :
You're wrong again, sir. Darkness is the absence of something. You can have low light, normal light, bright
light, flashing light.....But if you have no light constantly, you have nothing and it's called darkness, isn't it? In
reality, darkness isn't. If it were you would be able to make darkness darker, wouldn't you?
Prof:
So what is the point you are making, young man?
Student:
Sir, my point is your philosophical premise is flawed.
Prof:
Flawed? Can you explain how?
Student:
Sir, you are working on the premise of duality. You argue there is life and then there is death, a good God and a bad God. You are viewing the concept of God as something finite, something we can measure. Sir, science can't even explain a thought.. It uses electricity and magnetism, but has never seen, much less fully understood either one.To view death as the opposite of life is to be ignorant of the fact that death cannot exist as a substantive thing. Death is
not the opposite of life: just the absence of it.
Now tell me, Professor.Do you teach your students that they evolved from a monkey?
Prof:
If you are referring to the natural evolutionary process, yes, of course, I do.
Student:
Have you ever observed evolution with your own eyes, sir?
(The Professor shakes his head with a smile, beginning to realize where the argument is going.)
Student:
Since no one has ever observed the process of evolution at work and cannot even prove that this process is an on-going endeavor, are you not teaching your opinion, sir? Are you not a scientist but a preacher? (The class is in uproar.)
Student:
Is there anyone in the class who has ever seen the Professor's brain?
(The class breaks out into laughter.)
Student
: Is there anyone here who has ever heard the Professor's brain, felt it, touched or smelt it? No one appears to have done so. So, according to the established rules of empirical, stable, demonstrable protocol, science says that you have no brain,sir.
With all due respect, sir, how do we then trust your lectures, sir?
(The room is silent. The professor stares at the student, his face unfathomable.)
Prof:
I guess you'll have to take them on faith, son.
Student:
That is it sir... The link between man & god is FAITH . That is all that keeps things moving & alive.
NB: I believe you have enjoyed the conversation...and if so...you'll probably want your friends/colleagues to enjoy the same...won't you?....
this is a true story, and the
student was none other than .......
..APJ Abdul Kalam, the former President of India.
Friendship!!!
Friends
My best friend iz the one who brings out the best in me.
————-
Give me one good friend, one who’ll tell me 2 my face when I’m acting like an idiot, and you can have the rest.
————-
If u are looking 4 a friendship that iz forever loyal, always humble, never criticizing, and constantly listening, than buy a dog.
————-
Cigarettes and coffee an alcoholic’s best frndz.
————-
A circle is round it has no end, thats how long I want 2 b ur friend.
————-
The medicine of life is 2 have true faithful friends.
————-
True friends r very difficult 2 find, hard 2 leave, and impossible 2 forget.
————-
A true friend reaches 4 ur hand and touches your heart.
————-
Life is nothing without friendship.
————-
True friendship is like sound health, the value of it is seldom known until it is lost
————-
A true friend is one who thinks you are a good egg even if you are half cracked
————-
A friend knows the song in my heart and sings it to me when my memory fails
————-
Friendship is one mind in two bodies
————-
Best friend is someone who knows all about you and loves you anyway
————-
What is a friend? A single soul dwelling in two bodies
————-
Many people will walk in and out of your life, but only true friends will leave footprints in your heart
————-
One who finds a faithful friend, finds a treasure
————-
Friends are angels who lift our feet when our own wings have trouble remembering how to fly
————-
One can’t complain. I have my friends. Why, someone spoke to me only yesterday
On The Wings of A Butterfly
Your friendship is special
Like the flowers that bloom,
Or when a butterfly emerges
From within its cocoon...
You remind me of that butterfly,
Loving and free,
Bright and colorful,
For the world to see...
We will share sunshine and rainbows;
Sometimes, the rain and the snow;
We'll stand together through it,
While the cold winds blow...
When the time is right,
We won't stop to ask "Why?"
Our friendship will take flight
On the wings of a butterfly ...
You
When you are sad,
and you feel you can't go on.
Tears well in your eyes
and the pain is so strong.
So far from your friends,
and you're all on your own.
No-one to run to,
So very alone.
When all seems so useless,
and you can't take anymore.
As you put on your coat,
and head for the door.
Remember.......
I was there once,
lost, all alone
You can cry in my ear,
Just pick up the phone.
When you are lonely and feeling so blue
Someone is thinking ...thinking of you
Friendship
When you feel sad and betrayed
Who can you count on every single day?
When you feel lost and alone
Who will be there for you in every way?
When you've made mistakes and bad decisions
Who can you count on to tell you you're wrong?
When you feel you can't go on
Who will be there with a feel-better song?
Look into your heart and you will find
That person you can trust is not far away.
Look deep into yourself, don't give up,
For if you do, it's yourself you'll betray.
When you're looking for answers
To all your questions and dreams,
There is one person you can count on,
It's impossible, I know, it seems.
But take a few moments to look deeper inside.
Look into your heart and there you will see.
You'll be surprised when you find out
That you've been looking at ME.
You Are My Best Friend!
Best friends we are ,
Best friends we'll be,
For always forever,
You and Me!
Longer than a phone call,
Deeper than the sea,
All this belongs to us,
You and Me!
Put it in a bottle,
Never let it free,
keep it in your heart,
You and Me!
I hope you read this poem,
Remember it for me,
Look after it with care,
You and Me!
------------------------ Posts Automatically Merged -------------------------
Thursday, June 10, 2010
"Ten Things Allah (SWT) Won't Ask"
1... Allah (SWT) won't ask what kind of car you drove;
He'll ask how many people you drove who didn't have transportation
2... Allah (SWT) won't ask the square footage of your house;
He'll ask how many people you welcomed into your home.
3... Allah (SWT) won't ask about the clothes you had in your
closet;
He'll ask how many you helped to clothe.
4... Allah (SWT) won't ask what your highest salary was;
He'll ask if you compromised your character to obtain it.
5... Allah (SWT) won't ask what your job title was;
He'll ask if you performed your job to the best of your ability.
6... Allah (SWT) won't ask how many friends you had;
He'll ask how many people to whom you were a friend.
7... Allah (SWT) won't ask in what neighbourhood you lived,
He'll ask how you treated your neighbours.
8... Allah (SWT) won't ask about the colour of your skin;
He'll ask about the content of your character.
9... Allah (SWT) won't ask why it took you so long to seek
Salvation;
He'll lovingly take you to your mansion in heaven, and not to the
gates of Hell.
10... Allah (SWT) won't ask how many people you forwarded this to;
He'll ask if you were ashamed to pass it on to your friends.
He'll ask how many people you drove who didn't have transportation
2... Allah (SWT) won't ask the square footage of your house;
He'll ask how many people you welcomed into your home.
3... Allah (SWT) won't ask about the clothes you had in your
closet;
He'll ask how many you helped to clothe.
4... Allah (SWT) won't ask what your highest salary was;
He'll ask if you compromised your character to obtain it.
5... Allah (SWT) won't ask what your job title was;
He'll ask if you performed your job to the best of your ability.
6... Allah (SWT) won't ask how many friends you had;
He'll ask how many people to whom you were a friend.
7... Allah (SWT) won't ask in what neighbourhood you lived,
He'll ask how you treated your neighbours.
8... Allah (SWT) won't ask about the colour of your skin;
He'll ask about the content of your character.
9... Allah (SWT) won't ask why it took you so long to seek
Salvation;
He'll lovingly take you to your mansion in heaven, and not to the
gates of Hell.
10... Allah (SWT) won't ask how many people you forwarded this to;
He'll ask if you were ashamed to pass it on to your friends.
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